Santa's secrets solved

Jan. 5, 2011

You may not know this but Santa is a brilliant engineer and physicist.

You may not know this but Santa is a brilliant engineer and physicist.

Professors in the Department of Mechanical and Aerospace Engineering at North Carolina State University asked their students to explore the aerodynamic and thermodynamic challenges for Santa to deliver gifts to millions of kids worldwide in a single night from an airborne sleigh, reports the Chicago Tribune.

Students concluded that Santa has expanded Albert Einstein's theory of relativity to take advantage of "relativity clouds" that stretch time and bend the universe. These rips in time allow Santa to deliver gifts while only a few minutes pass on Earth.

As for Santa's sleigh, students posit that it is an advanced aerodynamic design made of honeycombed titanium allows it to alter its shape in flight while at the same time makes it stable enough for landings on steep roofs. Fastest routes are selected with the help of laser sensors and, according to professor Larry Silverberg, a porous nano-structured skin outfitted with its own low-pressure system that reduces drag up to 90 percent.

But the question remains, how does Santa determine who is naughty or nice? One possibility is that a mile-wide superthin mesh antenna relying on electromagnetic induction principles picks up brain waves of the children, filter algorithms organize their desires and behaviors and microprocessors feed the data to an onboard sleigh guidance system.

Another eye-opening theory is that Santa does not carry all those presents in a single sleigh. Instead, he creates them on each rooftop using a reversible thermodynamic processor or "magic sack."

Students theorize that Santa still delivers presents the old-fashioned way, climbing down the chimney dressed in a fire-resistant halocarbon polymer suit.

Hmmm! I suspect he does that for the cookies awaiting him.